Wednesday, March 13, 2013

The Return

Hi!
This feels like entering an alien territory, my fingers doing an awkward dance on the keyboard not sure of WHAT to tell. How about "it has been sooooo long since I bla bla bla" - scratch that. I think i used that line once and to run it again feels like a horrible cliche. Or maybe a wistful "things have changed so much that I don't know where to start bla bla bla" and that sounds like an emotional rant waiting to happen.

Truth is, I'm in a middle of reality shake-up. It's that blackout phase in your life in which nothing seems to go according to plan. Instead, carefully planned plans spawned into something unexpected, but-not-always-bad-sometimes-shocking sort of thing. Like that plan to take dancing class. Too busy, no time. Or learn how to bake banana cake. No time, too busy finishing novels (let's face it, Jess is no domestic goddess). Or that person you thought you can't live without. Turns out you can and he wasn't what you wanted. How about that dream trip that wasn't suppose to happen but will happen soon (God willing) because you're just THAT crazy to face the possibility of being broke for months?

I dreamed of something else a year ago. An entirely different story line, with different cast, different theme song - masterpiece la konon.

Suddenly, as if the earth didn't move and the sun stopped shining, I'm on a completely different path weathering bitchy currents and (un) pleasant surprises. The only thing that God let me keep is the amazing group of people that I love dearly (you know who you are). So shit happens and you cry, you lament, you got angry, you regret, you rant, you accept, you forgive yourself, you let go and you move on, you keep your head high knowing that at the end of the day...

the best part is just about to start.

Stay positive people! #prayforsabah